A Close Friend

Last Saturday, Nick and I met with Jaclyn and Jim for a quick rehearsal. It went well, and as always, we discovered new things about characters. After that we went to meet Todd at our main location, to map out the final scene. It posed quite a few issues to figure out, but it was a good thing. After the rehearsal with Jaclyn and Jim, I needed the release. Why? It was the first time acting with both of them together, and the scene we all share is a fairly tense one. With Jaclyn there, though, I finally realized just how defensive acting out that scene makes me feel. I was ready to kill someone - and that's all because of how in touch with the character of Paul I am.

I wrote a blog entry that I'll have posted on my site tomorrow (2.12.09). It's about saying a final goodbye (shameless plug HERE), and it got me to thinking... the time is coming where I'm going to have to say goodbye to Paul. Now, you'll hear me get very excited when talking about shaving and cutting my hair - I can't wait to look like myself again, however saying goodbye to my character isn't going to be as great. I fall in love with my characters. You'll hear those who say you shouldn't do that because you won't be able to allow them to have faults, but that is not a problem for me. Discussing a situation with Nick and Jaclyn, I was having a very, very hard time accepting what they were deciding. It wasn't as the writer, because I agreed that their idea was best for the plot, it was as the actor... I was having a hard time with it because that's just how my character Paul would react. It wasn't easy for me to swallow, because as Paul.. I wouldn't be comfortable or happy with things going that way. I wasn't rejecting the idea, though it seemed that way, I was just having the same emotional response as my character. So, to say that I get in deep with my characters is an understatement.

Come shooting time, I get even deeper into character, but before that day comes, I always prepare. For a movie Nick made a few years ago called The Lost, I played a hitman. Not a reckless or action-oriented killer, but a true, psychological take on someone who was little more than a shell of a man. The performance is EXTREMELY low-key... so low in fact that it may appear that I'm a lousy actor ;) What I did to prepare myself, though, was to take away so much of my own personality that I was left with what little this character had. That was a few months of preparation... Get Back has been in the planning stages since about November 2007 AND I wrote the bloomin' thing. For over a year, I have been studying this character and learning what makes him tick. It's been a very educational and rewarding experience, but realizing that it will end is a bit hard. Physically looking like myself again (all clean shaven and adorable) will certainly help, but it's definitely going to be hard saying goodbye to Paul. He's been on my mind for a long time, and it'll be weird without him.

Of course, he'll always be in there... somewhere.